“Yeah, I’m into the Flaming Monkeys and Exist right now.”

“Who?”

“The Flaming Monkeys and Exist. They’re really underground and new.”

“Oh, you said the Flaming Monkeys. Yeah, I know them. They’re amazing!”


All lies. Substitute the fictional “Flaming Monkeys” for any completely obscure, underground, fresh artist and I’m sure you’ve heard this conversation going on somewhere around campus. Perhaps it’s even happened to you. It’s the curse of the Music Elitist.

You know the people to whom I’m referring. They seem to know every cool band under the sun before they even realized they were cool; the people who you hide your iPod from so they won’t mock your selection of Kelly Clarkson’s “Breakaway” (which was an excellent album — even Kelly Osbourne thought so) and the Billboard top 40. Music Snobs. They tote around their music collection like a badge of honor while the rest of us sing show tunes (with choreography) at the top of our lungs in the privacy of our locked rooms with the curtains closed (everyone does that ... right?!). It gets to the point where you feel like a second-class listener if more than three people like your favorite band.

It’s time we unite. Anyone who’s ever felt like their taste was subpar, anyone who doesn’t have time to research who everyone is “into,” anyone who just likes what they like and doesn’t feel the need to make any excuses for anything — band together (pun intended). Blast your Beastie Boys proudly. Don’t be ashamed of your absurdly large collection of Yanni. Britney? XXXtina? Any other seemingly sweet-turned-media-train-wrec k? Pump up the proverbial jams.


And the next time someone criticizes your music taste or looks down on you for not knowing the next big up-and-comer, you can hold your head up high because you know that you carry just as much weight as they do in the world.

Or just take comfort in the fact that you have enough ’80s pop music stored away somewhere to dull the pain of inferiority.